Time

It's been a while.

Feeling a bit lost again. Kind of, wandering in my mind. Getting too caught up in the mirror, not talking to myself enough.

Im a bit upset with his face, but I always am. It changes too much. Need to get away from the internet again. Wastes my time. Reading/looking at the same things over and over again.

I like to imagine that I use it wisely, but I hardly do.

Just trying to sort things out. Never realised how much time drawing took up. I'm starting to feel like...is this the right thing for me? I want to draw, and illustrate for a living I think. But maybe the problem is I'm still trying to draw for everyone else. Need to draw more for myself maybe. It's hard trying to find a right answer.

Christopher in one of Cleo's dream I think. He's got a weird face again, but Cleo likes that sort of thing so it's okay.

Speaking of dreams. I had one last night. First one i could actually remember for a long while now. I was in a neighbour hood. There was a really thick mist out, and tom and I had to walk from this resteraunt we were at with the rest of the family back home to pick something up. The fog was super thick, and the rest of the town was dead quiet except the resteraunt that had this kind of patio, and lanterns all around it. Anyway, we're walking around and of course i'm acting like an idiot. It was really dark so tom was like " lets use my Iphone light app thing" And i took it out and it did nothing. So i just messed around with it while we were walking.

I put it on so that it would do the weird strobe light thing it can do and some kids at another resteraunt (nearly identical to the one we just came from) started going on about how its tinkerbell from peter pan. SO i waved it around pretending it was the fairy. They went hysterical.

So we walked by a huuuuge lake. I was sure Ive gone by this lake before in another dream, but anyway, it had these mounds of dirt with a huge leaf in each mound it looked like. But I knew better.

We got home, but right next to the hosue was a little girl, with her pet. Dont remember what the pet was, think it was a rabbit. And a really huge black dog. She said she was going back home to her real neighbour hood. She went down a hole in the dirt, that was surrounded by pipes and whatever. We followed her down. Her neighbourhood was bright and lovely, and colourfull, unlike our black and grey misty one back above the ground. We rode a giant turtle over another lake to get to the rest of her town. Everyone was happy there and everything, but I could tell something wrong was going on back home.

After spending time there we went back up, and everything was in shambles. It looked as if there had be some terrible war and we had been gone for a week. Bodies were everywhere, and it looked really bad. I saw the giant black dog behind a fence that was placed there after being blown away. It cried and came up to us. It was thirsty I thought.

The most vivid thing i can reember was pulling out this huge ice box that was filled with tepid water. It didn't look particularly dirty itself, and I moved it over so the dog could drink it. Which it did, and afterwards I could see that there was body parts and bits of flesh in the bottom of the crate. I felt nautious. I wanted to go back to the better town, so we left, big black dog, little girl and rabbit and all, down the drain.

I woke up.

Incidently the dog looked like an even huger version of Ellie, but with droopey ears



Takeyo Toyama - Hello 88 - 01

Meanwhile, in Space

I havn't had a lot of time to draw recently because of generally just going out and doing things ( so yeh, i'm still pretty busy every now and again )and whatever spare hours i get from time to time i spend lazing about or playing Mass Effect and just end up getting a bunch of dialogue with like, 5 minutes of actual shooting action. Bleh. For some reason I still feel compelled to play that game. Perhaps cause I was really investing my mind recently into a space story with Asakati in it.

It's going okay. I need alot of revision to do with the suit and everything, but I havn't thought too much about his papearence, and been mapping out the story in my head.I want to actually sit down and write it, but I want to also finish my actual website finally. Sometime. Someday.

and



I drew that yesterday. I sometimes forget how soothing and tranquilizing TegakiE can be. And it actually makes for a good medium for doing short comic/etc. in. I'm really close to doing a really really short one on there. It's so crisp.

Other than that it's been work and hanging out with the family. I got myself a really bitchin planner though and some of the best writing pens ever. So, I'm going to be sooooo organized this year. I think I did pretty good last year. I did quite a lot and acutally started moving on with what needs to be done. So this year I'm going to keep myself productive and move on even further. So, thats what I'm going to go do. Be productive. After my site is up, I'll probably be able to start drawing properly again.

Peace and love n whatev <3

2011

Happy New Year everyone.

Was actually supposed to finish this for Christmas (obviously) but between work/christmas shopping and going out for dinner with the fam, I had nearly 2 hours every week to work on it durring the month of December. I'm happy with it though, and may turn it into a card next year if I still like it.

I think Antonio enjoys getting into the spirit of things.

This new year... well I have a lot of things I want to do. I'm doing my citizenship test on the 6th of this month. I'm sure I will pass... and after that we just have to get some shit together to show some people and they can be like " aiight, you coo, stay wit us yo."

This will mean that I have no worries anymore. I'll have my job, and not have to study for some strange test and tom will stop pestering me about these things.

I've grown alot this year. I don't sit around moping like an asshat anymore, crying about things past and acting like I'm lost. Because I'm not. I've got everything I've ever wanted and then some. The only thing I've yet to acheive is my everlasting goal of improvement in my work. Which...is on it's way. So here's some other stuff I've yet to post, that I've sketched over the days.



I did this one while sitting in bed waiting for Tom, then worked on it some more over the days after I started it. I'm pretty happy with this, Tom and his mother really like this one I think. He wants me to paint this one as well, but I'm not sure if I'll get along to doing that...maybe.

I also started this picture of Asakati, but never really got around to getting serious about it, though mind you I wasn't really planning to in the beggining anyway.

After a bit I have decided that I do actually want to do a space sotry with Asakati in it, because I love drawing him in space suits and things. He looks good in them. So, I will do that, and it's going to be a really bad ass story, I promise.

And now that I have nothing to worry about this year except working when I have to ( which isn't a problem, because I love my job. It's the most awesome thing ever and gives me the giggles forever), I can spend a good deal of time developing stories and getting shit done for real. I know I say this like, everytime, but it was always a case of, oh I dont have a job, let me get one, oh i have to study let me do that, but oh my stories, let me work on that but oh, my studies, but oh i need a job.

No more running around in circles.

This is why I'm so hyped for this year.

Well I best be off. Gotta do the getting ready stuff, Tom and I are off to a pantamime this afternoon. I hope it will be good, other wise, im going to be annoyed :c.

Keep it snazzy.

Also :

Radiohead - Pyramid Song

Let's do this shit.

Lullaby

Trade done with Enzymer. Whole story here

Havn't really come across any new music or anything as of late except for one good jingle.

TheLittleBird - Lullaby (jazzanova remix)

Quite soothing and relaxing and kind of gets me in that majestic sort of Christmas mood.

Iv'e had hardly any time for painting either. Since I started this new job at the candy store, it's taken quite alot of commitment. I've been doing a few less days than I have been these past weeks, but the only days I get off I usually have to run off and do other things or take care of the house. Being a grown up is hard. Oh how I miss the days of old.... It's not that bad really. I think it's mostly because Christmas is coming up so alot of time has been running around town to try and pick up gifts etc. I kind of miss sitting around the hosue and painting/playing games though. I was playing Saints Row 2 again with Ren the other night, and it was pretty ball slapping hilarious. Runing around nekked in a pint sized motor bike as I was 3 times biger than every other player in the game. It's a difficult situation to explain. Perhaps I can take a picture or sommat.

I have been working on a Christmas picture though, since I did a thanks giving one. Thanksgiving and Christmas are probably my two favorite holidays ever. They just mean alot to me.



Still trying to get better at this painting thing. I'm slowly gaining more confidence and finally realising my potential, and that it isn't that hard to actually finish a picture. And that it's also okay to just sketch something sometimes without going all out on it. Speaking of sketches, here's something else I did at the laundrette some weeks back.



It's not anything spectacular, as drawing in the laundrette is a bit weird. Lots of distractions, and always some random person saying " did you draw that? " as you hold the pencil and book in your hand. They're genreally nice people who mean no harm, but it's pretty funny.

Work work work. I'm nearlly having drawing withdrawl symptoms. I'm sure after the season , I should have more time...or not. My employer has a few plans after holidays which might land me a full time job.... It's nice having money, but I don't know if I can give up drawing... I'm a bit scared. I don't want to get stuck. It would be nice to have some money saved up and things..but time is a precious thing. It can be taken away any moment. As much as I love my new job, it's just not what I'm meant to be doing...


I've got a few other useless sketches lying around that I'll drop later. Hope I can finish my christmas picture before christmas comes! Maybe this weekend.

Turky Day

Alright, so, this was supposed to be a Halloween picture but, I really had no time to work on it. So now it's a Thanks Giving picture. Thought i'd make it Saturday Evening Post-esque. I hate drawing letters/numbers usually, but these weren't too annoying.

So Christopher done stole Cleo's old American Football gear, and likes to play around in it. Like nub. Alone. He also likes to smang it.

Check it:




Probably one of my favorite music videos.
So much work this coming week.

Keep it snappy.

P.S: Here have another wallpaper : Bam

Mata, Rainen

An Ayami Kojima study, done in TegakiE.

He reminds me of Tom when we first met.

Tujiko Noriko + Tyme - Mata, Rainen

Moneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneyyup

Cleo's face! It exists! Christopher is obssessed with Cleo (in every sense of the word, but most of you know that). He speaks french and stuff too. And is just all around retarded. He's also very very superficial. Doesn't belive in love and all that (like most people) and I would imagine his theme song would be Diamonds are Forever as preformed by Sherly Bassey. Love that song.

But some other good stuff I came across :










And have some videos

Yelle - Je Veux Te Voir
Yelle - A Cause Des Garcons

Lots and lots and lots of music. I'm not usually into electro pop type things but I guess it's been growing on me as of late. The Magnetic man song always comes on while I'm at work ( we play Radio 1 all day) and it's like the only song that I don't mind.

Other than that I havn't gotten around to doing a whole lot, just some other things that I whipped up quickly



Only naughty people will try to click that one. So if you've already clicked it, it's too late.Sorry.... Christopher is pretty lame at boxing, and when he loses, it's up to Cleo to ...comfort him. I guess.



And I did this one for Belicosa, cause I love Pytor. Hes mad sexy :c. And dangerous. I started colouring that one too but, don't know if i'll get around to finishing it. Might do, its not terribly difficult.

I'm really trying to get to grips with painting and doing things in colour, as well as a timely manner. It always seems that everyone else can do these huge magnificent peices in days, where it takes me ages just to do something simple. Maybe I've got it all wrong and they all take their time as well. Hmm. Well, just keep drawing I suppose. It's just one of those things where while I'm painting/drawing I really feel like I actually am progressing, but once I'm done I think, damn, I totally could work harder/do better than that.
One of these days i'm probably going to smash my head into a wall. I feel a bit weird too as my content is kind of...normal? I don't like drawing worriors, or wizards or half nakked lady witches. I'm not very much into high fantasy I guess. I sometimes feel like, alot of the more well recognized work is mainly that, or something "quirky". Maybe I'm just bitching and being an ungreatful punt. Maybe I should give those kind of things a try, and maybe -just maybe- I'd like it.
Just have alot on my mind about my own work. And my stories. I have quite long drawn out lives of my stories in my head, and barely write or materalize these things. I just need to stop being a huge brat and sit down and -do it-.

Hm. I think I will.

Well, here's some wallpapers I made for those of you who would like to be naughty 100% of the time.

1
2!
3!!

Ya'll have a good time. Keep it real. Keep it fresh.
I've got to go do the laundry.